Mike and I have decided to celebrate our anniversary this year by taking a vacation and going to Disneyland. Call me cliche, but Disneyland is my absolute favorite place on earth. I really do think it's magical, and every time I go, or even think about it for that matter, I get as giddy as a five-year old girl doped up on funfetti cake opening birthday presents. Seriously, I am a die hard Disneyland fan. If we lived in LA, you bet we'd own annual passes. And you bet we'd be there every weekend. Every day. Every waking hour they were open. You get the picture.
Anyway, so we planned a little trip. Booked a flight, hotel room, bought 2-day Park Hopper passes, yada yada. We did this probably a month ago, and while I've thought about it nearly every day since then, I only just realized this afternoon that we will be leaving in less than two weeks. And while I am so extremely overly-excited for this trip, I am also so extremely overly-anxious even thinking about leaving Ava for three nights. Yes, I know that we are leaving her in the safest of all hands, but still, this will be the first time that we spend a night away from her. And it won't just be one night, it'll be three. Three! Three whole nights! Ninety-six consecutive hours we will be away from her.
I am sure that I will suffer total mental breakdown on more than one occasion before then, and I know that kissing her goodbye and leaving her will be equivalent to having my heart ripped out of my chest, rolled around in the dirt, stepped on, and blown to pieces with a shotgun, but it is something I must do. Something I must learn to accept. As a mother. I must do it and accept it as a motherly duty. But six months is so soon to separate! Shouldn't she be eighteen, packing up for college, and driving into the sunset only to return for holidays and occasional weekends?
I understand that I am blowing this completely out of the water, but yes, I am nervous. And sad. And I don't want to leave my baby. Even if it does mean I get to visit the most Magical Place on Earth.
But this is something that I owe to myself. And I owe to Mike. And we owe to each other. So yes, I must do this. And I can. And I will. Just as long as I can make 2192890183 phone calls to check-in and reassure my unnecessary anxiety.
I mean, come on, how am I going to ever be able to leave this face?
4 comments:
That IS a precious face! She will be safe, and you can call as often as you need to, or like to. I am looking forward to spending some time with her and Josh, and seeing the rest of the family. You two just have a good time together!
Aww look at her hair, its comin in quick! I have only left Hunter with a babysitter once! For 2 hours! I know what you mean. I know its hard, but Justin and I are planning a nights getaway for our 2nd year anniversary. Its so nerve-racking but your right, we as marrieds owe it to eachother! Good blog!
Mike and I have left Ava with various friends and family on more than several occasions for several hours at a time, but this will be the first time we'll leave her for the night. Scary!
Nana wants them both! Package 'em up and send on over! I'd be in 7th heaven...
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